Sunday, October 25, 2009

forgive me

I have this pit right in the bottom of my stomach that only seems to tighten as this night goes on. I'm sick, I want to throw up, that's how sad I feel for you. When your whole world depends on us keeping it right, here we go and do something tremendously wrong.

We've lost your best friend, your confidant. The one that comforts you when you wake in the middle of the night. The one that you snuggle with on the couch when you need time alone. The one that you rub back and forth over your elbow owies. The one that calms you when no one else can.



It seems like such an unfair thing for you to have to go through. You are two years old, your world should be this huge chocolate chip cookie with rainbow sprinkles world, every day.

It's not that I want you to go to kindergarten with your blankie hiding in your backpack or you keep it until it is shredded and torn from being pulled on, tugged on, tied up to... it's just that you don't get to make the decision to move on, to put your blankie on the top shelf, by yourself, and for that I am sorry.

I'm so very sorry. Forgive me.

Update: The hotel found your blankie in with the laundry (or so I assume...). Now, I just have to deal with the stigma of having your stinky, toddler slobbery blankie mailed back to us.

So you can finally stop being a pain in my butt.

Love, Mom

21 comments:

Unknown said...

Aw, I know he'll forgive you, hon.

Evonne said...

I've been there before and that feeling is the worst.

I tried to make her feel better with words, but I caved and bought my daughter another blanket. She tells the story now like it's no big deal, but she wasn't the one walking through Wal-Mart crying like a baby looking at blankets!

It is hard, but he will forgive you!

Morris said...

You're a good mum. You feel the feelings but the feelings don't make the decisions, and that's as it should be.

Allison said...

Aww...I agree with Chelle...he'll forgive you and that you feel so sad for him I'm sure shines through to him. I'm sure to have you as a mom is to him that huge chocolate chip cookie even when things don't go "right".

Anonymous said...

*HUGS* It'll be okay. He still loves you!!

Widge said...

look at that gorgeous baby blues! he'll forgive you....

Liz Mays said...

Oh...his little face...it will be ok. Mama, it will be ok for you too.

Half of a Duo, Raising a Duo said...

motherhood=guilt and choices that help strengthen kids for down the road.

hugs!

my kids never had transitional objects, they are each others' transitional objects...

Rebecca said...

Oh, how sad, for both of you!

kristine said...

Aw, it happens. I know it's not that easy for them to uncerstand, but it'll be ok.
And yes, he will forgive you.

Emmy said...

My 5 year old still has a blankie.. he hasn't been able to take it with him since he was 2 though, so it is a just at home thing. :)

Unknown said...

You are a good mom. He will be alright. I know you feel like crap right now, though. When we took the paci away, it was hellish for 2 days, and then that was it. I felt guilty and horrible and like the worst mom in the world until that 3rd day...

This too shall pass.

Tonja +Jere + Kids said...

awhhhhh
it'll be alright and you two will be fine.

Wisconsin Parent said...

what? my blankie is still in my purse!?! (actually owen will be like an addict coming off crack cocaine when his "special blanket" has to go in the memory tub).

Beth P. said...

Poor little guy but poor mama! Please know that he'll be okay and will forgive you. He loves you, blankie or no blankie!

Come visit when you have a minute - I have an award for you.

A Crafty Mom said...

Awwww, don't worry, mommy guilt is no fun. It's tough but he'll get over it - and so will you. I tried replacing my son's blankie with a new one but he wanted no part of that. (And although you were only joking, he *does* often take it to kindergarten . . . folded up at the very bottom of his backpack!)

Shan said...

Oh, those *eyes*... so sweet. You'll both come through it... him more than you maybe, haha.

AiringMyLaundry said...

Awww...

He will forgive you.

Half of a Duo, Raising a Duo said...

I can't even imagine the guilt.

A sucks his thumb and neither use a blankie. The DH and I both sucked our thumbs until we were like 10.

No one ever made fun of us but I am nipping it in the bud this week with this stuff that gets painted on the thumb that tastes bad.

And I feel guilty. But better that than braces down the road.

hidden said...

Why do you do this to yourself? He's only two. Can't he keep it a bit longer?

amanda said...

yay for the hotel laundry!!

oh happy day :)

ps - pretty sure he will still be a pain in your butt (a cute one, but still)

xo

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