Thursday, October 4, 2012

labeled

The folders are just sitting there right now, on top of the printer, each one appropriately labeled, stashed with coordinating print-outs and resources, just waiting for me to do something about them...

It's like knowing what I already knew.  Can't I just go on with the status quo?  Does this confirmation make me feel any better?

No.

It's feels like a mountain dotted with barricades and fences.  Where instead of a sword, I'm handed these three damn purple folders and told to go off... 'fight a good fight'.

But I don't want to fight.  I'm not sure I have enough courage, or energy, or even fight in me to do everything that he needs.

And as horrible as it might sound, I do wish there was just some magic pill that he could take that would make it all go away.

I tell people on the phone that 'it's fine, he's only 8, there is so much that can be done to help him.'

We went into his third grade classroom telling his teachers that this is a 'building year'.  Where we don't have all the answers yet, all the pieces to the puzzle, but we are getting there, and that's the most important thing... that we are heading in the 'right' direction,

right?

I want to make it easy, saying that sounds stupid though, who doesn't want 'an easy life'.  But as a mom, you know what I'm saying, that you would do anything in your power to make you child's life less... punctuated.

For me, it's the part about 'that reading will be hard for him, that spelling may be an overwhelming task, that he may never really enjoy reading, that these are things that will always be harder for him' that makes me want to throw up.

It's just more labels to throw into my f'ing labeled folders.

11 comments:

Shan said...

Sending huge loving hugs. The quandary is that a person can be *so* incredibly smart and struggle with these problems.
One of my sons first friends struggled, especially through the primary grades, because of some learning disabilities. He is a very smart kid... he really does just learn differently. The thing is, he will tell you he's a slow learner. That it's harder for him. But he will also tell you that he's in the midst of his second year of college, which is really like his third year. Because he took AP classes and college courses while in high school.

It's not impossible to surmount.

And regarding my own son? We went the medication route. If I had it to do over, I would start with biofeedback (which is ineffective after being on medication for too long).

<3

amanda said...

first? and i know you don't want to hear it, and i know you will roll your eyes...but i am proud of you. very very proud of you. i know it's not easy. but you are doing it. putting one foot in front of the other. listening. to yourself. to the teachers. and most importantly to him.

you do have enough courage, energy and fight in you. it's called being a mama. and on the days you don't feel like playing? that's where we come in. right next to you.

always.

i promise.

xo

Unknown said...

My heart's with yours, girl.

This is brave and honest and he is lucky to have you.

(Yes, he is.)

Love him up, keep the folders near, and tackle them when you're ready.

(Yes, when.)

Unknown said...

My heart's with yours, girl.

This is brave and honest and he is lucky to have you.

(Yes, he is.)

Love him up, keep the folders near, and tackle them when you're ready.

(Yes, when.)

Amelia Sprout said...

To give you a little hope. My brother has ADD and Dyslexia. He is 32 years old and absolutely LOVES to read. Reads more than I do, by a long shot. (he doesn't have kids yet) For him, it clicked when he found what he loved to read. (sci-fi, fantasy, and scientific magazines) It will click for him too. There is an even greater understanding of the differences now so that he will better resources than my brother did. He'll get there. You're on his side, and that is what really matters.

Shan said...

Reading Amelia's answer made me think of what got Corey reading... Captain Underpants. Probably perfect for your boys, too. Poop, comics, acting up and saving the school all in one fabulous series. Two heroes, too.

darcie said...

Big Hugs Mama...He's got you, what more can he need? He can, and he WILL succeed.
xxoo

LutherLiz said...

Hugs! I don't have experience, but I know that you will find a way to work with this, because ultimately You are the person who will always see him as wonderful as just who he is. Good luck and I'm thinking of you guys!

Krystyn @ Really, Are You Serious? said...

So very good that you listened to your momma gut and are starting the process (I had 17 yo students whose parents were in complete denial so they never got any help or services that would have been so beneficial).

I know there will be ups and downs and more challenges to come, but he's very lucky to have you on his side.

Emmy said...

So sorry -- that would be a hard one to swallow as reading is a big part of things. But I know you will do everything in your power to make sure he is getting the best help he can and he will be great

Unknown said...

All you need to do is teach your children how to pray, pray, pray cuzz, believe-you-me, this lifetime is over fast as we'll see when my sweetheart perished at 17. Wanna heer bout it?

I realize the following is literally above any other superfluous objective mosta U.S. mortals can conceive; however, while I didn't descend into Hell for my sins, I ascended till I saw the Celestial City far away. Wanna heer bout it??

Lemme fill-you-up withe efficacious epiphany, the avant-gardness and necessary wisdom to achieve Heaven, dear, if ya desire Heaven (many dont, preferring to stay 'laissez-faire' [i dont care] till death).

If 'freedom lies in being bold' (Robert Frost), doesn't pushing-the-envelope also result in the Elysian Fields of Utopia? And if I'm the sower, we plant the Seed; if I'm an artist, we RITE the symphonies heard Upstairs ☆IF☆ we accept His lead withe orchestra...

Wanna find-out the fax, Jak, in a wurld fulla the 'power of cowards'? Wanna wiseabove to help a poor 'Plethora Of Wurdz' [POW!] which are look'n for a new home in thy novelty?? Yay!

Q: But [gulp] can anyone tell me the difference between K2/IQ? A: Nthn. In Heaven, we gitt'm both HA! Need a few more thots, ideers, wild wurdz (whoa, Nelly! easy, girl!) or ironclad iconoclasms?

VERBUM SAT SAPIENTI (Latin: words to [the] wise): As an ex-writer of the sassy, savvy, schizophenia we all go thro in this lifelong demise, I wanna help U.S. git past the ping-pong, pop-cult-politixx, the whorizontal more!ass! we're in and wiseabove to 'in fin sine fin' (Latin: in [the] End without End -Saint Augustine).

"This finite existence is only a test, son," God Almighty told me in my coma. "Far beyond thy earthly tempest you'll find tangible, corpulent eloquence". Lemme tella youse without d'New Joisey accent...

I actually saw Seventh-Heaven when we died: you couldn't GET!! any moe curly, party-hardy-endorphins, low-hanging-fruit of the Celestial Paradise, extravagantly-surplus-lush Upstairs (awww! baby kitties, too!!) when my beautifull, brilliant, bombastic girly passed-away due to those wry, sardonic satires...

"Those who are wise will shine as brightly as the expanse of the Heavens, and those who have instructed many in uprightousness as bright as stars for all eternity" -Daniel 12:3, NJB

Here's also what the prolific, exquisite GODy sed: 'the more you shall honor Me, the more I shall bless you' -the Infant Jesus of Prague.

Go gitt'm, girly. You're incredible. You're indelible. Cya soon. I won't be joining'm in the nasty Abyss where Isis prowls
thesuperseedoftime.blogspot.com
infowars.com
JohnLeary.com
-YOUTHwitheTRUTH
-------------------------------
PS Need summore unique, uncivilized, useless names?? Lemme gonna gitcha started, brudda:

Oak Woods, Franky Sparks, Athena Noble, Autumn Rose, Faith Bishop, Dolly Martin, Willow Rhodes, Cocoa Major, Roman Stone, Bullwark Burnhart, Magnus Wilde, Kardiak Arrest, Will Wright, Goldy Silvers, Penelope Summers, Sophie Sharp, Violet Snow, Lizzy Roach, BoxxaRoxx, Aunty Dotey, Romero Stark, Zacharia Neptoon, Mercurio Morrissey, Fritz & Felix Franz, Victor Payne, Isabella Silverstein, Mercedes Kennedy, Redd Rust, Phoenix Martini, Ivy Squire, Sauer Wolfe, Yankee Cooky, blessed b9... (or mixNmatch)

God blessa youse
(trustNjesus)
-Fr. Sarducci, ol SNL
☆refuse2Bindifferent☆
Abortion:
the war AGAINST women...

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